First Date – Your Wardrobe Says it All, Boys!

First of all, you are not too cool, too hot, or too intelligent the make an effort to dress nicely for a first or any date.  There is no reason why any guy should ever turn up to a date looking as though he just rolled out of bed.  This applies even if you met via online dating matchmaking or any dating service whatsoever.  Sadly though, many guys make the exact mistake of thinking that just because she agreed to go out with you, the ball can stop there.

This is so very wrong!  Females judge quickly and those judgments tend to stick.  If you show up looking like you don’t even want to be there, she will immediately assume that you don’t want to be with her, and then why would you have asked her out in the first place?  Don’t crush all the effort you have already put in by asking her out and arranging the date, by messing up one of the most important factors – how you look!

Perhaps this sounds shallow, but really, who wants to go out with someone who doesn’t want to make any effort for them?  Again, this very much applies to you even if you have done webcam in a dating web site or used online dating agencies.  If I may assume that you like the lucky lady and you do want the date to go well, then I will share this gem with you:  show it!

Never, ever don a baseball cap and sneakers as though you are on your way to some frat party, particularly if you have been out of college for more than three weeks!  Dress for your age, and what you will be doing – a sunset walk on the beach or dinner-and-a-movie will be well suited to a nice pair of jeans and a T-shirt that says something about the real you (e.g. your favorite band or a funny cartoon) and gives you talking points.

So do think about what you are wearing; if in doubt, a plain black T with jeans is a clean, classy, confident way to go.

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How to online dating with girl

Do you see girl after girl rolling her eyes and walking away when you use the same old lines over and over again?  If you use online dating chat, do girls immediately delete you after your greetling line?  Do you perhaps see the pattern here?  The thing is, it may not be you.  You might be perfectly attractive, cool, and intelligent, but cheesy pick up lines are the biggest turn off for women.  So maybe it is just your approach that needs a little polish.

Women do not respond to lines that objectify, belittle or mock us.  It’s really very simple.  We also don’t like guys who are negative or self-deprecating.  The “You’ll probably say no to this, but …” approach doesn’t work any better than, “Did it hurt after you fell from the heavens?”

Women like to laugh, and we like guys who can make us laugh. You don’t have to be a “funny” or “smooth” guy to make a woman laugh, and you don’t need an online dating matchmaker to do it for you.  If you can’t deliver a pick up line to save yourself, use that inability.  Turn around a cheesy pick up line to a deadly serious, straight-faced remark, then break the seriousness immediately with a smile.

Telling a cliché pick up line but giving it a twist can also engage a girl when she is caught off guard by an unexpected ending. Something like, “I have lost my number, give me yours?” could go from a sleazy demand to an amusing approach like, “Hey, I have a phone and you have a phone.  Maybe we could introduce their numbers sometime.”

The fundamental thing to note is that, if you are using a line, only ever say it as though you are making funny of the whole concept of cheesy pick up lines.  This is really difficult but not impossible with an online dating flirt.  If you can do this, you might make her laugh, which is as engaged as you can get us to be in conversation.

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Finding the Right Match With Online Dating

So you plucked up the courage, shed the nerves and the beads of sweat, and asked your lucky lady to go out with you, whether it was via online dating chatting or in person.  Congratulations!  Wipe that sweaty brow and give yourself a pat on the back.  Now, assume a look of fear, because what I’m about to tell you may be shocking.  That wasn’t the hard part!

As tough as the initial asking may be, the real test is the date itself.  So many guys make the mistake of thinking, “Well, she came out with me, so I don’t have to put in any more effort!”  Let me just sum it up for you by saying:  that is so, so wrong.  This is even more so the case if you were singles online dating and that’s how you met.

Generally, unless you are playing it cool and embarking on some greatly physical or messy activities (i.e. a lot of walking on a beach or in a rainforest, paintball, skydiving even!) then you should stick to the tried and true “confident guy” wardrobe:  jeans or slacks, a T-shirt that is either plain or expresses the real you (e.g. a band that you like) and a jacket if weather appropriate.

So, first of all, consider the activities you will be undertaking.  If you opted for a traditional dinner-and-a-show theme for the evening, then you should dress smartly but not too formal – aka, a full on tux is not acceptable unless you are going to a dress up party or a wedding (neither of which would be advisable on a first date anyway!).

And don’t think that you’re “too cool” to put the thought into it, because, in fact, from this point, you should be going the extra mile to make the effort (especially if you haven’t met in person before and you found her in online dating chat rooms) because now that she’s out with you, you’ve got to convince her that she wants to stay there!

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Best of love songs - Romantic music

If you enter “love songs” into any search engine, you will find billions upon billions of results of lyrics, downloads, ring tones, karaoke tracks, anything you can imagine. Even responses filled with ‘Free online dating’ and ‘Christian online dating’ or even the online dating info with the top 10 online dating! Poems about love date back centuries, not the least of which is anything from the pen of old mate Shakespeare. What is it about affairs of the heart that we find so consuming and fascinating that new verses are being pumped out day after day, often reflecting the same thoughts and conclusions?

Even more fascinating is that they never provide us with an answer to the love paradox that is satisfactory enough so that the long line of bile about unrequited whatever and adolescent claptrap can be ended. Do I sound cynical? Well, put your iPod or your mp3 on shuffle, or turn your radio on.

Is the first song that plays something to do with this noxious paradigm? Is Taylor Swift belting out about her fairytale romance, or Simple Plan whining about how no one likes them (surprising, given how upbeat and positive a persona they proffer) or is it more of a classic, like Elvis Presley’s ‘Are You Lonesome Tonight’?

True, nobody could have done it better than Elvis, but in recent times there has been such an overwhelming torrent of mass-produced bile (you can stand under my umb-a-rella-ella-ella-ella yeah yeah, comes to mind) that the classics that really touched our cold unfeeling hearts are now fast becoming obsolete.

That’s not even to go into the depreciation of the whole emotion of love in most of today’s pop culture – can something that proclaims “You make me want to la-la” ever really take the place of “Embrace me, my sweet embraceable you”? Maybe it can, if your level of romance extends only to the local online dating scene, or even exotic Nigerian online dating. I’ll stick to Presley.

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When You Want What You Can’t Have

“What could have been” is possibly the most tortuous concept in existence. Our capacity to imagine the most wonderful and the most horrific scenarios can, for some of us, be extreme; or at least extreme enough to prevent us from taking a chance on getting that which we are wishing for in the first place. Anyone who has ever contemplated checking out an online dating service will know what this means!

It’s a phenomena that might be explained better by someone who understands the principles of gambling better than I, but it seems that all we ever do in life is take risks – except when it comes to our hearts and that leap of faith from single to changing our Facebook status for “it’s complicated”.

This is the case particularly so when it comes to falling for a friend or a colleague. We have all been there, and it never seems to get any easier. If we confess how we feel, do we risk losing the friendship, or could it be that it all turns into something great? Indeed, something that could be a turning point in our very lives?

But on the chance that it might not work out for us, we stay silent, let our feelings go unexpressed, and lose ourselves the chance of something more. The thing is, life and love is risk. No matter what we do, there is always a chance that it won’t work out, as well as the chance that it might. That’s the very gamble that makes the journey exciting, even if you look through 100 online dating sites.

So how do you get started with dating chat? Don’t torment yourself with “what could have been” when you could find out so easily with a simple off-hand comment, or if you are a theatrical type, a grand gesture of your affection. Either way, at least you will know. And if the friend is any kind of true friend, they will still be there for you at the end of the day no matter what.

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First Date – For The Men Online Dating

The first thing you should know:  females make judgments quickly, and those judgments tend to be permanent.  We overanalyze absolutely everything, but we won’t breathe a word of it!  So if you turn up to the first date – particularly if you met through online dating personals or dating chat – as though you just jumped out of bed, we start to think:  “Why didn’t he make any effort?  He doesn’t like me!  This is a pity date!  He must not be looking for anything real.”

This may sound cracked, but honestly, who wants to go out with a person who turns up looking like they don’t want to be there?  So firstly, understand that the way you dress on a date could actually determine straight away whether that date might become a second one, or maybe something more.

If you think, “But she said yes to going out on the date, so I don’t have to do all this!”  Let me tell you:  you are so very wrong!  If I can presume that you asked her out because you do want this date to be followed up by a second one, let me share the number one tip for your dating wardrobe.

Think about what you will be doing.  If you are a big walker or if you are going to the beach or on a paint ball skirmish, then dressing formally in an attempt to display your wealth and class is definitely not the best idea.   If it’s a traditional but always acceptable dinner-and-a-show evening, then dress appropriately for the film and dinner venue.  That said, even if (for some reason) you are frequenting MacDonald’s and an animated film (please, please don’t!) it doesn’t matter – frat boy attire is still not acceptable (regardless of what your display picture in your online dating chat room is)!  Make the effort and dress to impress!

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Best Relationships Ever - Restore Your Belief in Love and Life

The best relationships always seem to be the ones that started as friends first – whether intended that way or not is unimportant – but along with that situation is the potential for losing not only the relationship but the friend you had in the first place. This is the sad possibility that can often prevent us from making a move in such a situation.

The thought of going from friend to … something more can be a terrifying one.  Even if you are going from online dating friends to love online dating, the dateing query is still there.  What if our ardour is not reciprocated?  What if it is, and then we end up breaking up anyway?  So often, the feelings go unexpressed and the friendship goes unchanged, simply because we are afraid of losing what we have to take a chance on something that could be more meaningful.

Someone who likes to bet may be able to explain the phenomena better than I, but it seems to me that we are willing to take risks on almost anything about ourselves except in matters of the heart.

But isn’t life and love all about risk?  It’s all risk, no matter what we do, there is always a chance that it won’t turn out the way we want it to, and that’s the whole point.  If you fell for someone and you could just tell them without it affecting the friendship at all or changing any circumstances, would you?  Chances are, that is what will happen.  Perhaps if you have an online dating friendship, this won’t matter and you will stay best online dating.

But you never know;  they could very well be feeling the exact same way that you are.  If they are, you could be the one who made the first bold move in a relationship that could be extremely meaningful.  If they don’t feel the same way, but you are totally cool about their reaction (even if inside you are tearing down walls) then the friendship should not be affected.  If you weren’t trying to get a date online dating before, maybe you should check out dating personals now.

Don’t torture yourself with what could have been.

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How to Ask A Girl Out

Does every girl you try to ask out roll her eyes and walk away after your first sentence or, if you are using online dating servies then your chemistry online dating needs a spruce? Is it perhaps because you are – knowingly or unknowingly – trying to seduce the lady by trying to use the number one turn off for most of us; a cheesy pick up line? If you are twelve, try a kids online dating service for online dating tips. If you are over 18, then you may be attractive, totally cool and/or intelligent (if so, please feel free to give me a call!) but a sleazy or lame approach can instantly ruin your chances of scoring that elusive first date at all.

Women don’t like being objectified. We don’t like being belittled, and we don’t like being mocked. This is particularly the case in frre online dating environments, and with online speed dating. Don’t make fun of us! It really is rather simple, and yet so many guys make the mistake of trying to put on a show of bravado by immediately distancing themselves with a cheesy one-liner they got from a bad late-night made for TV movie. Also, we don’t respond to guys who make a negative or self-deprecating remark like “You will probably say no, but …” or “I shouldn’t bother, but …”

Such approaches don’t work any more than, “Did you lose your halo when you fell from heaven?”

Women like confidence, humour, intelligence, and a genuine unique personality. You don’t have to be the funny guy or the cool guy or the smart guy. You just need to be yourself, and if your immediate thought upon reading that was, “Well, that hasn’t worked yet,” then maybe you have been trying too hard with pick up lines and such. Rehearsed lines will never make a girl weak at the knees, unless you are Irish, in which case, say whatever you want and we will swoon.

So next time you are trying to pluck up the courage to approach a woman, even if it through the top 10 online dating services, remember that she is single, too. She is probably nervous, too. And if you can just be yourself, you may just surprise yourself with yourself.

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